As a parent you would like to trust your children; but teenagers lie and the bond is broken, it puts a strain on the relationship. Once a parent realizes they have been lied to, feelings of anger may surface. While it seems to be a fact that teens and lies are like two peas in a pod, you want to know what steps to take to help your teen stop lying so that trust can be regained somewhere along the way.
The main thing to realize is that there may be many reasons why your teen is lying. Maybe they have become involved with the wrong crowd and feel that lying that is the only way they will fit in. You may also find that they use lying as a defense mechanism. A boost of self-esteem can also be a reason for lying. Whatever the reason, you want your teen to know that lying can cause serious consequences.
One of the most unfortunate occurrences in the parent and teen relationship is that to a teen telling a lie is not as serious as it is to the parent. It is understandable for a parent to feel a sense of responsibility when their teens lie. There may even be feeling guilty or a sense of failure. But there are some things to consider when it comes to dealing with a lying teen.
The moment you suspect your teen is lying, you need to give it immediate attention before it gets worse. Let them know you want to trust them and that lying will simply break the bond of trust you may have. Remember that trying to trap them in a lie is just as dishonest as the lie they may tell.
Explain to them how important it is to have a honest and respectful relationship and that anything outside of that will have clear consequences. Spell those consequences out so that they understand.
You, the parent must lead by example. Your teen needs to hear you being truthful. Even telling little white lies can lead your child away from success when it comes to be honest.
Teens and lying do not have to go hand-in-hand in your life if you take the necessary steps to break the habit early on. Recognize when they are lying, deal with the situation immediately, and explain that your expectation of them does not include dishonesty. You may soon find that they meet your expectation and so much more.
Written by Aurelia Williams